Finally I turn 33.1 - Thirty three years and one day. Whatever!
The scene at home was upbeat yesterday. Mum made dishes reserved only for special occasions, showing off her elite culinary skills and satisfying my ever greedy palette. The entire day was filled with dear friends and not so dear relatives, calling to wish me a great birthday ahead. Overall the day was simply fantastic.
Now came the best part of the day. After all the hullabaloo abated, it was my parents turn to take my birthday to the next level. Finding me happy with the day's proceedings, they sneak closer to me as if going to tell me a long lost family secret of sorts, and endearingly pop a question that could virtually turn a man's world upside down.
"So son", started my mother wistfully; "How was your day?."
The scene at home was upbeat yesterday. Mum made dishes reserved only for special occasions, showing off her elite culinary skills and satisfying my ever greedy palette. The entire day was filled with dear friends and not so dear relatives, calling to wish me a great birthday ahead. Overall the day was simply fantastic.
Now came the best part of the day. After all the hullabaloo abated, it was my parents turn to take my birthday to the next level. Finding me happy with the day's proceedings, they sneak closer to me as if going to tell me a long lost family secret of sorts, and endearingly pop a question that could virtually turn a man's world upside down.
"So son", started my mother wistfully; "How was your day?."
"It was great Ma..." I retort enthusiastically, not anticipating any trouble. (Me and my Birthday stupor)
"So, when are you planning to get married?", bang goes my mother with practiced ease and élan.
"So, when are you planning to get married?", bang goes my mother with practiced ease and élan.
I am too stunned by the suddenness of the question, to give any response. Till then, I was relishing the taste of the traditional kheer, and within seconds, the sweetness just evaporated by my mother's unsweetened and bland words.
With eyes wide open, trying hard not to let the reality of the situation sink in, I clear my throat and ask naively, "What was that Ma?"
"Come on son!", My father joins the conversation, as if backing my mother, "You are now 33 and within another year, you will turn 34..." (Yeah right Dad. As if I didn't know the math)
With eyes wide open, trying hard not to let the reality of the situation sink in, I clear my throat and ask naively, "What was that Ma?"
"Come on son!", My father joins the conversation, as if backing my mother, "You are now 33 and within another year, you will turn 34..." (Yeah right Dad. As if I didn't know the math)
"Haven't you thought of getting married and giving shape to your life?"
Now, I was in deep shit. A bachelor always dreads any invasion of his privacy and freedom by answering such insensitive questions. I try to evade the questions by giving cliché answers that any cornered man would, "You see Dad, I still have to shape up my career and finances, marriage can wait a bit longer. Don't you think so?"
Parents are a smart breed. That's how, I guess we imbue some of the latent smartness in our DNA. My Dad, sensing my clever defense, start to attack me with his emotional gyaan. He goes like, "When I was of your age, I had to take care of so many things, yet I took time to get married to your mum and now you and your sister are the living proofs of our marital success." (Wow! Well done Dad! By the way, what kind of justification was that?)
Now, it was my mother's turn once again to take the lead. Before going any further, I must warn you against one Bio-Chemical weapon, that is most dangerous and potent than a nuke - Tears.
Seeing me firmly stand my ground, my mother finally resorts to her deadly “Tear Wars” – capable of bringing down the mightiest of warriors. I take a cautious stand, as I have seen this in-genuine strategy before on various occasions. Within seconds, without any fore-warning, the tear gates open and a thousand drops of emotional warheads bombard the entire room, making me cringe uneasily on the sofa.
Now, I was in deep shit. A bachelor always dreads any invasion of his privacy and freedom by answering such insensitive questions. I try to evade the questions by giving cliché answers that any cornered man would, "You see Dad, I still have to shape up my career and finances, marriage can wait a bit longer. Don't you think so?"
Parents are a smart breed. That's how, I guess we imbue some of the latent smartness in our DNA. My Dad, sensing my clever defense, start to attack me with his emotional gyaan. He goes like, "When I was of your age, I had to take care of so many things, yet I took time to get married to your mum and now you and your sister are the living proofs of our marital success." (Wow! Well done Dad! By the way, what kind of justification was that?)
Now, it was my mother's turn once again to take the lead. Before going any further, I must warn you against one Bio-Chemical weapon, that is most dangerous and potent than a nuke - Tears.
Seeing me firmly stand my ground, my mother finally resorts to her deadly “Tear Wars” – capable of bringing down the mightiest of warriors. I take a cautious stand, as I have seen this in-genuine strategy before on various occasions. Within seconds, without any fore-warning, the tear gates open and a thousand drops of emotional warheads bombard the entire room, making me cringe uneasily on the sofa.
"I will cry and cry till I succeed", she seem to say inaudibly with a twinkle in her eyes.
I try to reason with her, pointing out my dreams and all the things that I wish to experience before I get tied down in this life-long bondage, called marriage. She pretends to listen to me with still moist eyes and finally declares understandably, "You can do all those and much more even after marriage, right son?". How many poor men have taken this bait and hit the dust hard.
Discouraged by the unexpected turn of events, I look up to a fellow man for support, but Dad was already sold and done. He, with his spectacles safely bridged on his nose, was intently waiting to hear my final reply. I turn my gaze pleadingly towards Mom, who is putting up her best melodramatic performance and efforts to convince me; and then, there is my sister, nonchalantly watching the entire episode with a sly smirk on her face as if it deserves me right.
Confused and clueless, I muster all my reasoning powers and get ready for my last defense; when I suddenly...
Wake up!!!
Wow...It was a stupid dream. Oh! Sweet God, I was only dreaming. What a nightmare?
Dear God! Thank you! Thank you indeed!
I look around frantically as if to confirm my not-so-blessed plight. My mother was in her usual place - the kitchen; my father was busy with his newspaper and my sister was watching me nonchalantly with a smirk on her face. (That's not unusual)
I get up from my afternoon siesta and ask Mum for a cup of coffee. She brings it with an expression that, I thought I had already seen somewhere. She gently places the cup on the table, sits by my side and asks me -
"So, when are you planning to get married?"
Bachaaaaaaaaaaaaaao!!!!
I try to reason with her, pointing out my dreams and all the things that I wish to experience before I get tied down in this life-long bondage, called marriage. She pretends to listen to me with still moist eyes and finally declares understandably, "You can do all those and much more even after marriage, right son?". How many poor men have taken this bait and hit the dust hard.
Discouraged by the unexpected turn of events, I look up to a fellow man for support, but Dad was already sold and done. He, with his spectacles safely bridged on his nose, was intently waiting to hear my final reply. I turn my gaze pleadingly towards Mom, who is putting up her best melodramatic performance and efforts to convince me; and then, there is my sister, nonchalantly watching the entire episode with a sly smirk on her face as if it deserves me right.
Confused and clueless, I muster all my reasoning powers and get ready for my last defense; when I suddenly...
Wake up!!!
Wow...It was a stupid dream. Oh! Sweet God, I was only dreaming. What a nightmare?
Dear God! Thank you! Thank you indeed!
I look around frantically as if to confirm my not-so-blessed plight. My mother was in her usual place - the kitchen; my father was busy with his newspaper and my sister was watching me nonchalantly with a smirk on her face. (That's not unusual)
I get up from my afternoon siesta and ask Mum for a cup of coffee. She brings it with an expression that, I thought I had already seen somewhere. She gently places the cup on the table, sits by my side and asks me -
"So, when are you planning to get married?"
Bachaaaaaaaaaaaaaao!!!!
Peace in oneself. Peace in the world.
P.S. - Mum/Dad - This was a piece of harmless fiction. It is not intended to hurt anyone's sentiment or feelings. All the characters mentioned in the story are real, and so is the question.
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